how to combat negative self talk

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Have you ever found yourself having a really good chat inside your head? Was it a little negative, egotistical, harsh, and just plain bad banter?

Don’t worry. You’re not alone. We have all done it.

Here’s the how what and what I do to combat negative self talk/

Firstly let’s start with the why? How have we all been here? My answer; society and the way it’s going. The use of social media. And not doing the work on our selves and our minds.

We are our own worst critics. We compare ourselves to others. We judge and compare ourself to others based on their looks, body shape, colour, smartness, income, title, etc. We are quick to tell our selves that we aren’t good enough.

Sounding familiar?

Right let’s change this, together. Because it isn’t easy.

What to do when those thoughts pop up
Every time a negative thought, words or even a dimmer in the light pops into your head – immediately think of three positive things.
Negative – “I’m not pretty enough”
Positive 1 – >> I have a beautiful smile
Positive 2 – >> I have bright eyes
Positive 3 – >> I am beautiful.
Feel strange and like you’re lying to yourself? Well your not. You are beautiful, everyone is. It’s just that society and advertising are projecting this one look that every one feels that they have to be. And for majority, it’s not possible or what we actually want deep down. When you accept yourself completely, you’re going to be a much happier person.

Meditate
If you’ve been following me for a while you know that meditation is on all of my to-do lists, because there are endless benefits. Now there isn’t a one type fits all here, you’ll have to trial which suits you better; guided, mindfulness, mantra, transcendental or spiritual.
There isn’t a right or a wrong way to meditate. It’s which ever you feel comfortable to practice. I often change between a couple depending on how my body is feeling.
You should meditate 20 minutes everyday, unless you’re too busy. Then you should meditate for 1 hour.
All jokes aside, start small. 3 minutes. Working up to 20 minutes or what you’re comfortable with.
Here are a few benefits of meditation and why you practice today; improves sleep, reduces stress, lowers blood sugar, reduces anxiety, brings clarity in thoughts & decision making, improves mood, allows self love, helps with weight-loss, improves relationships and even pain management. The list is so so long so give it a go what’s the worst that could happen.ย 
Give it a week, practicing everyday, you will start to feel and see the benefits.

Sleep
You’ve heard it before. We all need to get serious with our sleep. If you haven’t already, get your phone out and set an alarm for your bed time. That’s correct. No need to re-read the sentence, you read it right. Set an alarm to get yourself into bed to allow yourself enough shut eye for your body to go through its night recovery process. Depriving your self of sleep is like only drinking 1/8 cups of water for the day or eating half of your lunch. Start taking it seriously. Get to bed on time, sleep 7-9 hours.
Quality sleep allows your body to recover so your mind can rest and recharge for the next day, it lower stress, improves your memory, improves mood and can help with weight-loss. Therefor helping you keep a good mind for positive self talk.

Diet
By the word ‘diet’ I’m not going to talk about any fad diet. I just mean the food you’re eating everyday. Fruit, vegetables, legumes, unrefined whole grains, nuts and seeds. Every fad diet have these same common denominators. You know you shouldn’t be eating chips and chocolate every day, so don’t do it. If you have kids, would you let them do it? Probably not. So parent yourself the way you’d parent your child.
We are literally what we eat. If you eat foods highly processed, there isn’t enough sustainable energy that you’ll absorb so you’ll feel tired and lethargic. If you eat fresh fruits and vegetable you’ll have enough energy to keep you energetic and positive though the entire day.

Exercise
We all know that when we exercise we release endorphins, which allows us to feel happy, focused and energised. Doing some form of exercise every day will help manage those monkeys in the mind. Ensure you’re doing something you love, not something that makes it feel like another chore. It is also really important to exercise because you love your body and you want to treat it like a temple rather then exercising because you hate your body and you want to change it. If you say things like I’ll stop being negative about my body when I loose 5 kg and then I’ll be happy, you’re depriving yourself of happiness. Enjoy the process and you will reach your goals quicker.

Social Media
Social media is pretty much a part of everyones life these days. It is really important that the people you follow make you feel good and bring some value to your life. Unfollow those negative accounts, unfollow those accounts where you know the girls bodies are photoshopped or just don’t bring any value to your scroll. Fill your scrolling with kind people, people that inspire you, teach you things you don’t know and things that bring you happiness to look at.ย 

Remember to be gentle with yourself, be kind to yourself. Don’t be so harsh to yourself. Let yourself make mistakes, it’s all part of the journey. I still have thoughts and even words the slip out that are negative but I’m able to change it around quickly. It all takes time and practice.

What type of thoughts do you mostly find yourself amongst?
Which step are you starting with first or what is helping the most?
I’d love to know how you’re putting a stop to all that negative self talk.

Peace & Happiness
Teags Lee x

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